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As you may have noticed, I haven’t been online much lately. I have been very busy preparing to move. I have bought my first house (jay!), in the area I come from originally. Quit a big decision, since I have been living in the capital of our country (Amsterdam) for half my life now. But now, knowing what helps and what bothers me, I’ve come to realize I need to be in a place which doesn’t get on my nerves as much, as a the big city I am living in.
A big city is always ‘giving’ sensory input. Here, in Amsterdam there is a never a moment of peace. There are cars, people, lights and noises everywhere, all the time, which can be appealing, if you are able to filter out most of this input. But I can’t. So I never feel as happy and comfortable as I can be.
I have felt this (uncomfortable) for many many years, but never knew why. I just guessed I didn’t really belong in a big city, for unknown reasons.
It feels good to get more control over how I feel, by managing my sensory input. I have spent quit some time in my home area, and my sensory overload, and autism symptoms are getting less and less, which is great. Also is it really nice to spend more time with my family 🙂
The move is quit stressful though, since I don’t like change much. But I am doing it at the lowest pace possible, to keep my stress levels as low as possible.
At the end of this month, I will be officially moved out. Looking forward to that moment, hopefully accompanied with a lot of piece (of mind).